the other side of me

I sensed a different in me. It's seems like I am changing. Kalau dulu aku selalu mengharapkan kehadiran seseorang dalam hidup aku untuk teman pergi mana-mana sahaja, tapi sekarang ni I rather be alone. Kalau dulu aku selalu pendam apa yang aku tak puas hati tapi sekarang ni, aku cabar balik apa yang aku tak puas hati. I too little for too outspoken.

I don't care what people talking about me. Masa dulu, I was very detail every word people throwing at me. Aku cepat terasa hati when people raise their voice to me even though it was not my fault, aku yang rasa inferior and cepat-cepat minta maaf walaupun aku tak salah. I was very naive. Aku takut hidup sorang-sorang. Aku ikut je cakap orang, takut kena tinggal..

Now, I become a new person. Those dark pasts has taught me to be an IGNORANCE person. Aku sudah tak peduli kata-kata belakang aku. I set my own decision. I become more secretive, more sarcastic, and more annoying. Bukan selalu tapi depends on situation. Sometimes,when I woke up from bed, asking myself what was I done yesterday? did I do anything that it shouldn't be? I remembered and put in aside. I do not want to care anything about it. It was past that CHANGED me, the way I am thinking now. Aku tau, aku akan ke arah negative. Tapi itu semua demi kepentingan aku juga. I have my own stand.

Sooner or later, aku tau sikap macam ni will push me down. I knew. Sometimes, I missed the old Intan, but sometimes I put my hands up thankful to Allah for making a change in the new Intan. Some of old characteristics is still unbound from this heart. It'll always stay forever :)
Adakah yang baru lebih baik dari yang lama?? Time will answer it. I'm a player in a game of fate. Still fighting to survive.

Thanks to Allah for meeting me with extraordinary people in my life :D

To all my friends, please accept me the way I am. I just a sinner saved by grace.

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